Sunday, December 02, 2007

Adult Supervision

Last night I went to hang out with Jack (a.k.a. The Offspring). Earlier in the week my good sense was overcome by the sheer wonderfulness of the craft store, so I ended up with several wholesome activities to inflict upon The Offspring.

We started with the make your own Super Ball kit.

Let me advise you, if you have kids who are easily disappointed. Do not buy this toy for them. It is absolutely impossible to create balls that look anything like the ones on the package. Fortunately, The Offspring has reasonable expectations when it comes to truth in advertising, and was openly skeptical about the likelihood that our finished products would match those on the box. He was absolutely correct. We did manage to make a few bouceable balls, however.

Then, I tried to sell him on the pirate ship kit, but for some reason "coloring on wood" was a big turn off for The Offspring. I asked him if he had tried coloring on wood before, and he said yes but he wouldn't elaborate. Maybe one of his parental units could let me in on the coloring-on-wood related trauma he has experienced because that's just weird.

I didn't see any reason to expose the kid to the horrors of wood coloring, so we moved on to making sun catchers that look like bugs. We both thought this was pretty fun, and our bugs turned out quite beautifully.

We took a few breaks to play Guitar Hero, watch Futurama, and have a snack. I also managed to accidentally expose the poor child to sadomasochistic sex slavery (thanks a lot, network television) before distracting him with the movie Dodgeball.

Although we were peacefully coloring when The Offspring's folks came home, I have to admit he spent an awful lot of time flinging our homemade super balls at the walls while I made helpful suggestions like, "Let's see what happens if you throw two of them at the same time." But seriously, if I wanted to be all responsible and discipliney I'd have my own kids.


SerenitySprings said...

I don't think you did any permanent damage - no more than we have, anyway. And there is no wood coloring related trauma - sometimes he's just an asshat. Thank you so much for coming over and handling his asshattery for a few hours. He's talked about you today and what a good time he had!

UnrulyDuckling said...

I had a blast, too. I'm more than happy to handle his asshattery whenever you need me to. He's a cool kid. If he had turned out too normal I would have to criticize your parenting to this point.

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